There ain't nothing
["Shadow Dancing" by: Andy Gibb]
? Vier? Non è possibile! CE N'EST PAS POSSIBLE! How the hell an idiot like HIM can be the Fourth Children? Nein! "Someone up there" _IS_ kidding! I WILL *NOT* STAND IT!
?TO WHOM I GIVE MY HEART?
Asuka was feeling so disturbed, confused and angry that she nearly forgot why the hell she had gone *there*. But her opinion and feelings about the Fourth Children should have the lowest priority for the time being. "Kaji, today you WILL be mine!" she repeated to herself for the thousandth time on that day. But the words she shouted next, looking into his eyes, were these:
? Baka Kaji! Odiami perchè? Why the hell don't you want *me*? Warum bist du so... Espèce de con! Damn it! Shit! I *am* damn beautiful, and I have always wanted you, and you have always known it, and yet... Damn it again! Whenever the subject is my sexual interest in you, you regard me as a dumb and ignorant baby hell, fuck you! You will never know how much you have do offended me by acting as if my love for you simply did not exist! Merde! It couldn't be because of the stupid opinions and comments from the others it is NOT the style of a man like you! It's a little too obvious that you have already dated AND fucked around with _many_ "little girls" like *me*. Knickers! What the hell did they have that I do not? What the fuck do you see in someone like _Misato_? And what the fuck have you seen in them all that you keep refusing to see in me? Fuck, Kaji! I want you to answer me right now! mich verstehst du?
Kaji didn't think that Asuka could be and *look* so deadly serious. Her eyes were pretty full of anger, and her face was even glowing. Definitely, she did look more beautiful than ever as well. For some endless seconds, they looked deep into each other's eyes she, impatiently awaiting a decent reply from him; he, carefully choosing the words he would say, and planning how to do the... "inevitable". At last, he calmly stood up from his chair, and very firmly laid his right hand upon the left shoulder of Asuka; her anger and impatience were instantaneously replaced by a mixture of great gladness and some fear she could do feel her dearest dream was about to come true finally; inside of her dress, she started to shiver; she blushed, and her eyes didn't dare to face his eyes when his left hand touched her face and he began to speak:
? You are absolutely right, Asuka-chan I have to admit it. Gomen nasai!
To tell you the truth, _IF_ it depended entirely on my will, I would never ignore
something pretious like your love for me; however... I had *no choice at all*.
Now Asuka *had* to look into his eyes again:
? Believe me, it's true! There *existed* a very strong reason for me to refuse to date you, and...
? ... no, Asuka, there is no use in insisting, I will *never* tell you why I did it.
? Listen: probably you would never understand, and, I am sure, if I showed you the whole truth... you would prefer not to have come to know it.
? Kaji... she sobbed, pleafully.
After having locked the door, he continued:
? Asuka-chan... now that you dare to ask for my loving *so* explicitly... I mean: that reason isn't valid anymore
? So, if you really want me that much... then I will be yours too.
? Kaji! Asuka exclaimed, her heart full of joy.
? For today only he added.
These words disappointed her deeply.
? Damn it Kaji! Why the hell "only today"? Asuka complained.
"Because, bishoujo senshi, very soon I will be dead anyway", Kaji answered her mentally. Very seriously he replied:
? The why and wherefore it may last for only one day *does not matter*. It's none of your business...
? ... and, besides, nobody else will ever know that it happened, and from tomorrow on, you and I will pretend it never happened. This is my only and final... "offer"... to you. Will you accept it?
? Are you serious, Kaji? ¿Would you *really* like that it happened in THIS way?
"Knickers! If there may be no other way of possessing you, so be it! Yes, my Kaji, make me your woman for today!" Asuka told herself. Giving him a quite explicit answer, she kissed his mouth as passionately as possible and, for the second time in that month, she was disappointed by her own heart. His lips and his tongue *did* have the taste of the mouth of Shinji... much to her deepest disgust. She was perfectly aware that there was a part of herself that was in love with Shinji... but she was quite damn afraid of admitting that part probaly was the truest one in her ????. Her most desperate effort to overcome the truth of her soul was just failing, failing spectacularly... and there was nothing she could do to help it. Oh well... Anyway, being kissed by the man of her dreams was also making her feel *so* fine, and... while that pretious moment lasted, nothing else mattered. Fifty-four seconds later, Asuka restarted the conversation:
? Kaji-chan!... amore mio... dich lieb'ich... May I tell you a secret?
? Of course you may.
? A very horrible secret, I mean...
? More "horrible" than this shameful brief love affair? he commented, ironically.
? Kaji... I wish... I wish that you were... mein Vater... so that I could love you even more Asuka confessed, pretty sure about the things she learned from life itself.
Unperturbed, Kaji felt like testing Asuka's reactions:
? You know what, Mädchen...
? ... even Misato wouldn't be able to behave so maturely as you are doing now.
? "Even" Misato? ANTA BAKA? "Especially" someone like her, I must say! And do *not* call me "virgin" if you really intend to keep your promise you fag!
Seeing her response had been more than appropriate, he could not help laughing out loud and she either.
? Well. We cannot do it here, Fräulein. Let's go to a better place.
? A couple of minutes ago, when I walked in this room, you said you were sooooooooooooooo busy Asuka observed with a wink of her left eye.
? Presently my job doesn't have maximum priority. Your sexual needs do Kaji stated, making Asuka admire him even more.
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Did it all begin when she kissed Shinji? No it all began on the very day she knew the (in)"famous" Third Children. She should have known better! The *real* reason why she decided to share the entry plug of her Evangelion Unit-02 with Ikari Shinji could not be other than love. There's a thin line between love and hate, as everybody should always keep in mind, and... actions speak louder than words, after all. Oh well...
How long had she been having a crush on Kaji? Since she was eight years old... however, as she believed that a "real man" like Kaji would never be sexually interested in a "mere" little child, Asuka "had" to hold back her feelings for him during three more years until the day she "became a woman". From then on, she believed, everything would be pretty easier to her lusts... "Things are not always that easy" this lesson she learned in the hardest way. As a sort of compensation for the lack of appropriate response to her desire, Asuka started to flirt and to date, say, "just for fun" actually, the only way she could stand kissing a boy(yuck!) was by making believe she was doing it with her beloved Kaji... since she could not possess the man she really wanted, the trick was so convenient and easy! So practical and efficient indeed, that one day she believed that she could do the same with an idiot like Shinji as well but life would prove she was wrong.
Of course she had good reasons to dislike Shinji. He hadn't needed any type of training to synchronize with his Evangelion Unit-01 "it was not fair!", in her educated opinion. Besides, in several ways the son of Ikari Gendou *was* an idiot so, "he didn't deserve to have become an EVA pilot". Considering these facts, Asuka *had* to demonstrate that she *was* better than Shinji at piloting an Evangelion. However, she was not. To hurt her pride even more, she *truly* enjoyed to have her body touched by his when they were alone together in the entry plug of her Eva...
No, she should not, could not, and would not admit falling for an idiot like Ikari Shinji. Then, though beginning to accept that she really wanted him somehow, she decided to convince herself that her hate for Shinji was much greater and stronger than her love for him. How? In Japan, she hadn't begun to date "just for fun" yet because she didn't think Japanese boys might ever be handsome; Japanese *men* might be handsome, and Kaji was the only one she was interested in. Because she planned to dedicate her loving to Kaji only, one fine day she forced herself to kiss Shinji. Asuka thought that she would manage to use Shinji like she used the German boys to perform her virtual datings with her beloved one. What a not-so-nice surprise. When she kissed him, for the first time she could not keep her eyes closed and imagine that she was doing it with Kaji; after eleven seconds of a tremendous effort to keep the eyes shut, her eyelids totally refused to obey her conscious will. Worse: the kiss of Shinji *did have been* so very special to her Asuka had never before felt the touch of a tongue that tasted so sweet, that really set her lips on fire, that did make her breasts go harder than ever, and that drove her pussy throbbing so strong... no, it was not a coincidence, that was the day her diary read (in Russian): "Baka Shinji! I hate myself for loving you!". To hurt her foolish pride again, her eyelids refused to open while she kissed Kaji; her imagination didn't obey either, and made her feel as though she was kissing Shinji once more.
And things didn't run quite differently when Kaji sucked her teats, licked her clit, screwed her pussy and her ass. After four hours of love, she prayed in silence:
"Mein Gott! I will belong to Ikari Shinji as you wish, but please do not make it happen so soon, please do not let it happen that soon!"
before starting to fall asleep. Few minutes later, Kaji went very glad to hear Asuka muttering:
? Baka Shin-chan!... Aishiteiru...
? As it should be... Demoiselle Kaji thought, but didn't speak.
Asuka would hate to be called "Demoiselle" by Kaji.
In the end, the Angels got what they wanted. They lost all the battles against the humans, and yet they won the war. Like perfectly stupid robots, the oldies from Seele and Ikari Gendou were manipulated by the One that sent the Angels to this planet; driven insane, they fought each other for the privilege of annihilating the whole humankind. The so-called "Completion" was never meant to save the humans after all; their Creator just got tired of Its old puppets and so made them destroy one another. That simple...
Shinji and Asuka were allowed to survive the Third Impact not only because they had never been completely human (no mere human being would ever be able to pilot an Evangelion with or without training), but also and especially because they were chosen. They were not Angels, but their children sure would be. The planet named Earth now belonged to an ancient and superior species AGAIN.
Forty-nine sunsets after the end of the humans, Shinji and Asuka hadn't yet done anything except eating, sleeping, talking, travelling, and fucking around. When they discovered that they could easily copulate tens of times a day, they clearly understood that the future of the world they were given should have nothing at all to do with the past they once knew and lived. With the help from his mate, Shinji was becoming smart. Quickly he was turning into an adult, a "real" one, and completely to the joy of Asuka, he was also getting not just handsome, but actually beautiful...
Forty-nine days... They had been alone together for seven entire weeks, and Shinji still hadn't told Asuka how much he had always loved and admired her; on the other hand, every night she repeated in her sleep:
? Shinji... Shin-chan... Mon amour pour toujours... Aishiteiru.
me to the
And let me
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And let me
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