Started: March 28, 2004
Finished: June 16, 2004
Current Revision: June 16, 2004
A Story By Warpwizard
A Neon Genesis Evangelion/Tenchi Muyo/Ranma ½ Fanfiction
Don't Sue Me Warning! I don't own Neon Genesis Evangelion/Tenchi Muyo/Ranma ½ and their associated characters and trademarks. Obviously.
Big-time Lemon Warning! This is a self-indulgent X-rated fantasy piece. Read at your own risk.
WAFF warning! Somehow, in spite of all the perverted goings-on, some heavy-duty WAFF crept into this chapter, so be warned.
Possible Non-"Tastefulness" Warning! This lemon is not necessarily a "tasteful" lemon, whatever the hell that means. I hope none of you are licking the monitor
Perhaps I should put in a porn "line of death", example below:
PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN CROSSING THIS LINE INDICATES ACCEPTANCE OF THE PORNTASTIC CONTENTS OF THIS FIC. PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN YOUR SANITY IS IN YOUR OWN HANDS!!!!!!!! PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN
* * *
[PAYBACK - DAY 44 - SUNDAY, LATE MORNNG]
[Domicile of Ranma Saotome and family, master bedroom]
Ranma woke, early, as he was accustomed to doing. Long years of waking up at dawn had left their mark on him, even though he could now sleep in if he wanted.
He sighed, happily. It was good to be in one's own bed, surrounded by one's loving wives.
A small form stirred on his chest. He stroked his hand through her fine black hair.
The small girl - no, small woman, though she looked awfully young for her 26 years - smiled in her sleep and clutched Ranma's hard chest to her like an oversized teddy bear.
"Mm Ranma-sempai "
Another part of Ranma stirred as the silken skin of Hotaru's bare leg rubbed against it.
A sweet, high-pitched feminine voice giggled in his right ear as he groaned softly with the pleasure of a morning erection. His groan deepened as a warm, soft hand slipped around it and began to leisurely stroke.
Savoring the familiar pleasure, Ranma turned his head and kissed the owner of the friendly hand warmly on the mouth. He was instantly reminded that she was one of the more hot-blooded of the bunch as she responded by deepening the kiss, slipping her tongue into his mouth and gently twining it with his own.
After a pleasant interval, he broke the kiss and panted, "Didn't you get enough last night, Mina-chan?"
The stunning golden-haired Japanese woman smiled a sultry smile, breathing softly on her hunky husband's face from where she was cuddled into his side. She gazed lovingly at him with heavy-lidded eyes. When she spoke, her voice was a smoky purr.
"I never get enough of you. You know that, Anata."
Ranma smiled mischievously. He knew that. Boy did he ever! Thank god all his wives weren't like that, or he'd probably drop dead one day from a vicious combination of exhaustion and fluid loss.
Minako pouted, knowing what was going though his mind.
"I'm not that bad!"
Ranma grinned and opened his mouth to retort, but was interrupted. His eyes bulged as a second smooth feminine hand fumbled for position on his manly rod.
A tired voice sounded from his left. "Urgh can't you keep your hand off his cock for even one minute, Mina?"
"And how would you know what my hand is doing if your hand wasn't trying to do the same?"
Ranma flopped his head back and left his wives to their morning banter. Hotaru's slight weight on his chest was like a living blanket, and the lush curves of Minako on the right and Makoto on the left were both soothing and arousing at the same time. The three girls were last night's winners of the usual "bedtime bingo" for the three available cuddle-spaces.
He smiled with his eyes closed, listening to the sound of his wives' sweet voices and enjoying the familiar touch of their hands. The gentle contact served to keep him in a state of pleasant arousal, but in no danger of becoming too excited. He'd been exposed to *far* too many excruciatingly arousing things, some in the near past (like last night), for that to happen.
A deep, husky, yet still extremely feminine voice purred from the air above him.
Ranma opened his eyes. Speaking of excruciatingly arousing things
Morrigan hung in the air above Ranma, dressed in magically conjured ribbons and lace, just enough material to barely cover her succulent flesh. Ranma gave her incredible body a thorough, appreciative going-over with his eyes, knowing that the succubus enjoyed being ogled.
Morrigan smiled. Ranma felt his heart skip a beat. The most inhuman of his wives was literally sexy enough to kill, just by smiling at you.
She gazed down at him with through her thick eyelashes, her eyes smoldering with her endless lust.
"Like what you see?"
Ranma grinned back at her, feeling his hard-on swell in Minako and Makoto's stroking hands.
"You know I do."
Morrigan slowly floated towards him, lowering herself with her inherent magic, inch by inch. "It's so hard when you sleep. Eight whole hours without you inside me "
Ranma swallowed against a dry throat. Minako's lusty (and loving) nature was a summer storm compared to the raging hurricane of the succubus' sexual needs. Sometimes he wondered if he was up to the challenge of keeping her "contained".
'Still, who *would* be up to it? Shinji? Tenchi? Those guys have got enough on their plates without adding Morrigan to the list. A martial artist's duty is a heavy one '
"Oh c'mon! You must have swallowed a quart of my cum last night. Can't a guy get a little break?"
Morrigan lowered herself into kissing distance and gave him a passionate smooch. Ranma couldn't help but respond. The sexual spirit's lips were silky smooth, inhumanly pleasant to the touch. Ranma's dick twitched in Minako's hand as he recalled the insanely pleasurable blowjobs he was regularly subjected to. It was a wonder he hadn't been drained completely dry before now.
"I had to share that cum with the other girls. I only got a half-quart, max."
Minako spoke up from where she was lying comfortably, enjoying stroking her husband's hard cock. "You're just greedy, Morrigan-san. It's a wonder we get any cum at all with you around!"
Morrigan levitated sideways a few inches. Minako "eeped!" as the lusty succubus' hot breath washed across her face. "I enjoy getting energy from men *and* women, Mina-chan."
The two females engaged in a passionate lip-lock for a few moments. Ranma couldn't help but watch. His dick began to achieve terminal stiffness.
Morrigan broke the facial suction with a wet pop. " but you already know that, you naughty thing." Minako licked her lips and smiled wickedly. "Mmm "
'Okay. That's it.' He decided to get up and start the day before a man-of-the-house-depleting orgy broke out.
'Of course, that happens every other day it seems '
Considering the truth of that fact, Ranma was grateful that the other girls helped keep Morrigan happy. They were all at least a little bit bisexual, but the most enthusiastically so, namely Minako and Mokoto, were a great help in keeping the half-domesticated succubus "fed".
not to mention her "soul twin", Lillith.
Morrigan continued to ravage Minako's lips with her own, ignoring the fact that she had a lolicon-succubus' head sticking out of her torso. As Ranma wracked his brains for how he was going to get out of here with his energy intact, Morrigan's "evil half", smiling cutely, slid the rest of the way out of her big sister's body and gently shook her best friend, Hotaru.
"Time to get up, Hotaru-chan!"
Hotaru yawned and rubbed her face with a tiny fist, shifting on top of her Ranma-bed.
The cute little succubus giggled as she spied something exposed by the Senshi of Silence's movements.
"Looks like something else is up too!"
Still giggling, Lillith floated over to Ranma's pulsing hard-on.
He let out a little gasp at the shock of the sensation as she pressed the cupid's-bow of her inhumanly silky lips against its glistening tip in a playful kiss, then with effortless little gulps she swallowed the entire thick, rigid length like an anaconda devouring a bush pig.
she may have been cute, and rather young looking, but she *was* a succubus.
Ranma groaned helplessly as the illegal-looking spirit of pure evil wantonly used her lips, tongue and throat to help extract the thick, creamy substance she was craving.
"Lillith-chan, you are soooooo bad!" Hotaru's light soprano rang out.
Ranma groaned again, pitifully. Maybe Hotaru could do something to fend off her friend?
The sweet giggle of the household's youngest member was heard. "Here, let me help you with that."
Ranma let out a long, betrayed sigh as a second small, warm tongue joined Lillith's in licking at his aching cockhead. He reached up and gave Hotaru's small, firm bum a playful smack.
Before the other occupants of the bed (which included the slender form of Ami, the currently sleeping blue-haired Senshi of Science, on the far side of Minako, and Setsuna, the tall green-haired Senshi of Time, on the far side of Makoto, also sleeping) realized what has happening, Hotaru and her friend had stolen two mouthfuls of their mutual husband's tasty sperm from under their noses.
"Ah! UNH! Unhhhhhhh "
Lillith eagerly swallowed the spurts of warm chi-loaded goo as they were sprayed into her sucking mouth. Life force *was* her food, so to her, Ranma's potent ejaculate tasted indescribably delicious. "Ohhh, that's so great yum!"
Hotaru was used to the salty flavor, and had acquired a taste for it. She reveled in her naughtiness as she took turns with her friend suckling at their husband's manly "spout". "Mmm "
Makoto smiled, heavy-eyed, from where she lay, her big boobs pressed against her husband's muscular side. She'd gotten screwed senseless last night and was still feeling it, so she didn't begrudge Hotaru-chan her extra helping of cum.
'Time to make breakfast '
The tall, sexy Senshi of wood and lightning sighed happily as she rolled out of their enormous bed and headed for the bathroom. A quick shower and then to the kitchen. She smiled as the teasing banter from the master bedroom faded behind her.
Life was good.
* * *
[Same day, domicile of Tenchi Masaki and family, master bedroom]
Tenchi Masaki wafted towards the surface of his own personal pool of awareness, gently, like a leaf wafting towards the ground on a summer breeze, but in reverse.
As his bodily senses switched on he became aware of the marvelous sensation of a voluptuous womanly body pressed against his own. He was lying on his side, and she was plastered against his front.
His hands rested comfortably on the generous curves of her full, shapely bottom. As she murmured sleepily, happily, against his throat, he became aware that he was as close to her as humanly possible, his erect penis buried inside the warm snugness of her female sheath.
She smiled and murmured again in her sleep. "Tenchi "
He sighed and relaxed against her. "Tsunami "
As the two settled deeper into the warm coziness of the large bed, Tenchi felt the firm points of a set of large breasts dig pleasantly into his back. Warm breath gusted against the back of his neck. "Ten-chiii ."
He smiled sleepily with his eyes closed. It was Ryoko of course, snuggled up to his back, spoon-style. The higher-pitched sigh from behind her was Ayeka, no doubt snuggled as closely to her friend the former space pirate as said ex-raider of starships was to him.
Tenchi enjoyed the peace and stillness of his bedroom, squeezing and caressing the blue-haired Goddess of Jurai's magnificent fundament idly as he thought. Her skin was absurdly pleasurable to the touch, soft and velvety. Sometimes he wondered if she'd designed that aspect of her human form just for him, but always shook the thought off as self-centered. Whatever the cause, it was difficult to stop touching her once he'd begun.
Not that she ever complained. Tenchi smiled and gave Tsunami's bum a firmer squeeze, causing her to let out a pleased little moan against the top of his chest.
In fact Tenchi blushed a little as he recalled their wedding night. He'd never heard someone scream so loudly in his entire life, and that counted Ryoko. And she was quite a screamer.
She'd been insatiable too. He'd needed to eat a meal big enough for three men and drink two full litres of water, once he'd finally managed to "subdue" her.
He'd gone to Washu to ask a few questions about her behavior. The red-haired supergenius had smiled naughtily and confirmed his suspicions.
"You see when they assimilated, Tsunami had a last chance to customize their shared body. She wanted to make sure Sasami enjoyed herself when you and she ahem." Tenchi's cheeks pinked a little, but that was it. It was hard to be embarrassed after what he'd just been through.
"I think she went a bit overboard. So combined with the fact that human sensations are still new to her means she's a bit well-"
Tenchi held up his hand. "I get the picture little Washu." He bowed politely. "Thanks for your help."
Washu smiled. "No problem, Tenchi. And if you ever need any help with " The diminutive genius let out a surprisingly carefree laugh in her distinctive nasal voice and wiggled her crimson eyebrows suggestively.
"Ten-chii " The rich, sultry voice halted him just before the lab's exit. He looked cautiously over his shoulder, struck by how much it sounded like Ryoko.
Washu, in her devastatingly sexy adult form, gave him a half-lidded stare. "I meant it about helping you." She began to stalk forward, slowly, like a great cat in human form. "Sometimes I get so lonely in this old lab " She pouted.
Tenchi was held for a moment, his heart pounding. With a wrenching effort of will, he pulled away from Washu's emerald gaze, ducked out of the broom closet and headed upstairs.
These days, he was almost certain that Washu's antics went beyond mere teasing. She'd already gotten her "sample", many times over, but seemed to hold herself back from a more intimate relationship. She never slept in the house's master bedroom with him, for instance, though he'd spent a couple of nights in a bed with her somewhere in the mysterious depths of her lab, when she'd kidnapped him from the other girls.
He cuddled Tsunami against his chest and listened to Ryoko's contented breathing. Was it because of her daughter? Or maybe because of Tsunami, who could be considered her "sister"?
Tenchi frowned. Or was it due to things in her past, either the breaches of trust he knew about, or one of the countless events in her long life that he had no way of discovering
He loved Washu as one of his family, and he was aware that he was gradually absorbing the Juraian ways of thinking about such things. Ayeka was his great-aunt for goodness' sake! So it was much less likely to be a problem from his side
He became aware of the girls stirring uneasily around him, disturbed by the tension in his body. With a heartfelt sigh he let the problem go. Washu was a million times smarter than he was, he should let her figure things out.
Tsunami and Ryoko relaxed along with him, cooing in their sleep and squeezing him between their vast collective boobage. Tenchi let out a little moan as his cock pulsed inside the Goddess' warm body.
'My wives are soooo sexy '
He could feel the sun warming the very edge of his face. Soon it would be above the horizon, and Tsunami - or Sasami, she answered to either name - would stir, eager to make breakfast for her family. That was something that hadn't changed with her growth into a different being, a fact which had greatly reassured all of them.
Thinking of family made Tenchi think of the one of "his" girls who had "gotten away".
Mihoshi was still part of their group, just not as tightly as before. She hadn't been able to compete with the surprisingly united front of Ayeka and Ryoko, and had been gradually looking around for a different fulfillment when she had somehow hooked up with one of Tenchi's two best friends, Shinji Ikari.
She was part of Shinji's family now, and that seemed to make her very happy, which made Tenchi glad. He smiled and idly caressed Sasami's back. He'd seen how brightly she smiled the last time he visited. She hadn't even been that clumsy, seemingly having found her "center".
He'd also noticed the way Shinji looked at her, and he didn't doubt that the wedding would be announced soon.
Tsunami stretched against his front, raising her hands above her head and yawning. She paused when she heard Tenchi's masculine voice purr, "Mm, that feels good "
She finished her stretch and gave him a sultry smile. Her eyes said without needing speech, I'd love to, but I have to cook. She blinked once, slowly. Later.
Tenchi just smiled and gave her a peck on the lips, as if he didn't notice a thing.
"I'll be up in a minute, honey. You go have your shower."
He could still hear Sasami in her voice. Which was nice. It hardly felt like 10 years had passed.
'I guess this is what it feels like to Galactics a decade is a like a year. Or less.'
Wondering if he'd ever get used to how things had changed since he was a boy, Tenchi Masaki got up to greet the day.
* * *
[Same day, domicile of Shinji Ikari and family, kitchen]
* * *
The Ikari family, husband, wife and two cuddle-maidens, hungrily devoured a delicious European-style meal of blueberry pancakes and real maple syrup, omelet with green onions, melted cheddar and fresh milled pepper, chilled freshly-squeezed orange juice it was a feast.
The male of the household did, anyway. Kasumi kept smiling and heaping his plate, and Shinji kept eating. The girls appeared to be enjoying their meal, but were content with daintily eating much smaller portions. Shinji noticed, and it stirred a thought that had been bothering him for some time.
It was hard to take seriously, but he'd been over it and over it in his mind and the fact of the matter was - and this still made him flush a bit when he thought about it - these days, the girls largely subsisted on a diet of his jizz, drunk piping hot from its organic spigot.
Shinji swallowed a mouthful of bacon and omelet, relishing the salty meat and smooth tastiness of spiced egg and cheese. He glanced over at Mihoshi. Normally she put it away like a lumberjack, but today she was content to nibble at a pancake and take sips of delicious orange juice. She smiled brightly at him and he smiled back.
'I love you, Mihoshi-chan.'
His smile faltered a bit when a vision of her from earlier this morning superimposed itself on his vision. She'd been staggering towards him on her knees, her normally flat belly bulging slightly with the stupendous amount of semen she'd swallowed. She'd audibly *sloshed* for god's sake!
He took a bite of pancake and glanced at Kasumi, who'd drunk enough cum this morning to fill the pitcher of juice she was using to top off his glass. He could all too easily imagine those full lips wrapped around his dick as she sucked hungrily, eager for a mouthful of her favorite creamy beverage.
He came back to himself with a small start and finished his pancake. Kasumi hummed happily to herself, taking neat little bites of bacon. It was the same piece of bacon she'd started breakfast with, and it was only half-gone.
Shinji's mouth twitched worriedly. Living on a diet of male reproductive fluid couldn't be healthy. He'd rather burn in hell than see her get a cold, let alone suffer from some sort of malnutrition.
Even his wife, currently savoring a small omelet, ate a lot less than she had a few months ago, before all this had begun. While she didn't seem to share her friends' insatiable thirst, she'd still swallowed her share of the salty white goo, so any effect on their health should also be affecting her.
Though he eyed her appreciatively. Her red-gold hair shone, and her skin was flawless, glowing with robust health. Asuka noticed his examination and smiled at him, her blue eyes soft with affection, so different from the hard crystal gems of years ago.
Shinji smiled back, fatuously. 'Absolutely perfect. She's a goddess.'
Asuka arched a fine eyebrow. "Something on my face?"
"Just thinking about how perfect you are."
The total lack of sarcasm in her husband's voice, and the loving look in his eyes, just about made Asuka melt in her seat. She smiled back, radiantly.
"Awwwww ." chorused Kasumi and Mihoshi. They clasped their faces in their hands and squealed in unison, "Kawaii!"
Shinji blushed and looked at his plate for a moment. He glanced up after regathering his thoughts. "Great breakfast, Kasumi."
"Yeah!" agreed Mihoshi. Asuka was still out of it, just looking happily at Shinji.
Kasumi smiled at her lover. "Thank you, hus-" She flushed. "Shinji-chan."
Asuka snapped out of her trance and looked at Kasumi. Mihoshi looked a little worried. An awkward silence fell over the previously merry breakfast table.
"I'll be back in a moment. Please wait for me."
Shinji got up and left in the direction of the master bedroom, his face unusually determined. The girls glanced curiously at each other and nibbled at the remains of breakfast, each lost in their own thoughts.
After a minute, Shinji quietly reentered the kitchen and went over to Kasumi. "Please come with me, Kasumi-chan. I have something to say to you."
Wordlessly and doing her best to look serene, but with some apprehension swirling in her big brown eyes, Kasumi allowed him to take her hand and lead her out into the backyard.
The other two female members of the household shamelessly maneuvered themselves so that they could watch through the house's glass-paned back door.
Shinji brought Kasumi to the far corner of the yard, into the small garden that Shinji had managed to create. It consisted mostly of a few clusters of common flowers, but it still managed to give that spot a little atmosphere. The sun was shining brightly, the leaves of a cherry tree rustled in a pleasant breeze. The door was slightly ajar, allowing the breeze to enter the house and Asuka and Mihoshi to smell the warm, green scent of the outdoors.
Mihoshi squealed. "Ohmigod, he's getting down on one knee!"
Asuka watched intently. Powerful emotions were churning in her heart, but she was far less upset than she thought she would be. Mostly she just felt happy for Kasumi.
'I think I'm finally growing up.'
Shinji reached into his pocket and pulled out a small box. He opened it, pulled something out and held it out to Kasumi. His hand was admirably steady. Both girls could see the bright glitter of what must have been a rather large gemstone, to be visible at that distance.
Mihoshi started bouncing in place as Shinji asked a question, without taking her eyes off the now-weeping Kasumi for one second. "Ohmigod ohmigod ohmigod!"
Asuka's emotions steadied down to a joyous warmth as Kasumi nodded frantically, and, once Shinji got to his feet, embraced him to cry into his shoulder.
She thought of Shinji's loving words of a few minutes ago, and now this. The bemused redhead smiled distractedly as Kasumi, still crying quietly, came through the door and was immediately glomped by Mihoshi.
"Oh Kasu-*meeee*, I'm so happy for youuuu!"
The two women hugged for a minute, and then Kasumi murmured into her bubbly blonde friend's ear. "Shinji has something to say to you too, Mihoshi-chan."
Mihoshi's mouth stopped moving instantly. She pulled her head back and stared into Kasumi's slightly tear-reddened brown eyes. "Oh? I, um, er, gee "
Kasumi smiled and gave her friend a little push towards the back door. "Don't keep him waiting, Mihoshi-chan."
"Oh, I " Mihoshi was uncharacteristically at a loss for words. She tentatively opened the door and stepped out towards Shinji, moving as if the ground were a thin pane of glass that an incautious step could break through. Her female audience watched raptly as the gorgeous chocolate-skinned woman took her place in front of Shinji, her golden hair blazing brilliantly in the morning sun.
Once again, Shinji, his face grave, dropped to one knee. Asuka and Kasumi felt identical amusement as Mihoshi stared at him, her big blue eyes wide, then smiled simultaneously as what was happening seemed to soak in, and she began to bounce, just a little.
The two girls' hearts melted as Shinji pulled another small box from his other pocket and Mihoshi started to cry. They could see tears pouring down her face as Shinji pulled a glittering ring from the velvet box and offered it to her. Her cry of "YES!" made its way to their ears, easily penetrating the wood and glass of the door.
Mihoshi didn't wait for her betrothed to get up, instead she tackled him to the ground and cried on his chest.
Asuka was a bit disturbed by the intensity of her blonde friend's emotions. She turned to comment to Kasumi and was held by her brown-eyed gaze.
Kasumi explained, using the knowledge gained from being one of the blonde's closest friends here on Earth. "Deep down, I don't think Mihoshi thought she would ever get married. She doesn't complain, but she's told me stories I think she's too used to being taken for granted."
Asuka nodded. She knew what it was like for people to treat you a certain way due to their surface impression of you.
Her heart swelled with emotion as she watched Mihoshi smile luminously and cry, her happy-go-lucky protective shell visibly dissolving in the swirl of her intense happiness. She blinked as Kasumi handed her a hand towel, realizing that her face was wet with tears.
Kasumi smiled and dabbed at her eyes with her own towel. "I'm so happy. I'm happy for me, and I'm happy for Miho-chan. Are you happy, Asuka-chan?"
Asuka smiled sincerely at her friend. "I'm very happy for both of you, Kasumi-chan."
She pretended not to see Kasumi's relief and gave herself a relaxing full-body stretch. "I think this is going to be a good week, eh, Kasumi-chan?"
Kasumi gave a shaky little laugh. "Oh, yes! I think it's going to be a great week, Asuka-chan."
* * *
Mihoshi glomped onto her tall, statuesque friend immediately upon reentering the kitchen, dampening Kasumi's blouse with her happy tears.
Shinji smiled at the two, then turned to his wife, his expression becoming serious.
"Can we talk in the bedroom, Asuka-chan?"
Asuka nodded, her face equally serious. This made Shinji's heart beat faster and his stomach flip over, though he tried not to show it. Horrible thoughts filled his mind during the short walk to the master bedroom. Would this be the end of their happy love-quadrangle or whatever the hell you wanted to call it? Would Asuka display some of that volcanic temper she was famous for, the temper that he hadn't seen in months? Would -
The bedroom's sliding door click-clacked shut, and he turned to face her only to meet a warm kiss on the mouth.
"That was sooooo romantic!"
Shinji's eyes made that "blink-blink" noise you only hear in anime. 'I didn't know real eyes could make that noise '
"You're not mad?"
Asuka snuggled into his chest and murmured, "No "
Shinji wrapped his arms around his lovely redheaded wife and held her tightly. "I wanted to discuss it with you, but "
Asuka continued to talk from her comfortable position, face against his shirt. "You acted on impulse when we had that awkward moment. I think it was the right thing to do."
She finally looked up and smiled at him, her mobile mouth quirking to one side. She shook her finger teasingly. "You shouldn't have waited so long! I'm sure Kas-chan and Miho-chan didn't appreciate living in sin all this time."
Shinji put on his best "clueless" expression and nodded as if only realizing Asuka's point this very minute. "You're right, Asuka-chan. I'm sorry."
Asuka's lip curled in distaste at the sound of his old catchphrase until she caught the corner of Shinji's mouth twitching upward. She pounded on his chest with one small fist. "Oh, you beast! You know I hate it when you apologize!"
He smilingly accepted the gentle blow, then wrapped her in his arms and gave her another hug. "I'm sorry for saying I'm sorry." Asuka made a discontented noise against his chest. He patted her back and smiled mischievously.
"You know what I mean, honey."
The couple hugged for a moment, then separated. Blue eyes looked into blue eyes for another long moment as they stood apart, holding hands.
"I guess we should get back to the kitchen before Kasumi and Mihoshi get worried."
Asuka nodded. "If we stay in here any longer the two of them are liable to have a heart attack."
Shinji raised an eyebrow and shook his head mock-solemnly. "And if that happens, someone will have to go and get Nurse Washu."
Asuka smiled at his jibe and seized the opening. "Speaking of Washu-san - I mean Washu-*chan*-" They both smiled. "-I'd like to go visit her today. I want to ask some questions about all the things you can do."
Shinji paled slightly, seeing that his wife was serious. He liked Washu, but venturing into her lab was not something that one did lightly. The stories Ranma and Tenchi had told him had made that blatantly clear, not to mention the one time she'd managed to get him in there. He'd never been one to enjoy tentacle-rape anime, but if he had, his one visit to the red-haired genius' stainless steel paradise would have ruined it for him for life.
"So many - grabbing -"
Shinji woke from his brief trance, aided by Asuka's finger-poke to the ribs. She gave him a piercing look. "Is there something I should know?"
He shook his head dumbly. "I just - they've told me stories, Ranma and Tenchi I'm not sure it's safe to go down there."
Asuka rolled her eyes. "Oh come *on*, my beloved husband." She patted his hand comfortingly. "I'll protect you from the big bad Washu, okay? She's the smartest person we know, and I'm not exactly comfortable going to our family doctor and telling about what you can do."
Shinji couldn't help but be a bit irritated by his wife's attitude, but he tamped it down. 'She can't possibly know what it's like when a guy gets trapped in Washu's lab.'
As Asuka slid the bedroom door open, and they began walking to the kitchen, hand in hand, it occurred to him that perhaps that was a good thing. Steely mechanical tentacles plus sexy redheaded wife didn't equal anything he wanted to think about sober.
* * *
Kasumi and Mihoshi turned their heads as the other two members of the household entered the kitchen. Their eyes looked worried.
They were washing the dishes, or rather Kasumi was washing and the blonde detective was drying. It struck Shinji that Mihoshi hadn't broken a dish in weeks.
Kasumi's usually serene voice was a bit wobbly, though both she and her friend had an underlying glow of happiness. "Is everything okay, Asuka-chan, Shin-chan?"
Asuka and Shinji shared a thought, not for the first time in their marriage.
'Damn, I think we stayed in the bedroom too long.'
Both noticed how their friends' gaze lingered longer on Asuka than Shinji, recognizing her as the "deal-breaker".
Asuka smiled brightly. "So, is it going to be a double wedding, or two singles?"
Shinji restrained a chuckle at the two girls' dazzling smiles. 'Well *that* certainly settled the question of how upset Asuka was.'
He went over to the stove and began absently devouring the leftover bacon from the cast-iron pan while the women chattered, his Ranma-trained body demanding fuel. 'Women and weddings at least I'm full.'
"Well, I was thinking of a big double wedding, if Miho-chan wants, but it depends on what tradition she was brought up in."
"I'd love that, Kasumi-chan! My planet - I mean my culture, they "
* * *
Next chapter: A Visit to the Neighbors, Part Two
* * *
Shinji gulped. He was strapped to a large metal table.
* * *