Gendo knew that he should be feeling incredibly guilty and disgusted with himself, yet he did not feel the slightest bit bad. In fact, he felt better than he had for a very long time.
Rei's cheek was resting gently against his bare chest as she regarded him silently with heavy-lidded eyes. He could feel her warm body pressing against and entwined with his own, her soft, smooth skin moist with perspiration as she pressed herself as closely to him as physically possible.
As he ran his fingers slowly through her damp, silky hair, he closed his eyes and savoured the sensation of her slow, regular heartbeat and the relaxed rising and falling of her chest. He traced random circular patterns on her lower back with his thumb and felt her shiver slightly, shifting in his embrace in an attempt to get even closer to him. She rubbed her wet, sticky crotch against his upper thigh and let out a small purring noise. The smell of sex lingered strongly in the air and Gendo's crotch was sticky with his - and Rei's secretions. A large wet spot covered the sheet beneath them. He pressed his own semi-erect cock against her belly and sighed contentedly.
After the first time they had done it, he found himself hard again less than ten minutes later, so they did it again. Then he kept himself inside her for more than an hour as they kissed passionately, invading each other's mouths with their duelling tongues. Then they did it again. Then he allowed himself to fall asleep whilst still inside. This was not like with Ritsuko, who would hurriedly take a shower, dress, leave his office and return to work. This felt warm and close and pleasant. He just wanted to hold onto Rei and never let her go.
It had surprised Gendo to return home from a busy day sorting out everything he had let slide at NERV to the smell of cooking. Rei never cooked. He did not believe that Rei even knew how to switch on the oven. Before she came here, she was living almost solely on a diet of instant ramen and curry. He hung up his coat and peered around the kitchen door.
The place looked like a tornado had hit - by all appearances, a tornado that enjoyed throwing food on the floor and breaking plates. Amidst the chaos and spillage, there was Rei, dressed in her customary school uniform, calmly stirring away at a pan of mixed vegetables. Delicious aromas filled the air. She turned to look at him as he entered.
"I made dinner, Commander." Her voice was as soft and emotionless as ever. Gendo could only stand and stare.
"I see." He rubbed his bearded chin thoughtfully.
"If you excuse my presumptuousness, I have placed your whiskey and cigarettes upon the table in the conservatory. I believed that you may desire a drink before you eat, sir."
Utterly flabbergasted, the commander left the kitchen without saying another word and walked quickly to his waiting alcohol and tobacco.
Gendo stared out through the dirty glass of the conservatory as the last rays of the setting sun illuminated the overgrown, disordered garden - creating long, menacing-looking haphazard shadows. He took a swig of Jack Daniel's directly from the bottle and remembered the times he would sit here with Yui in the weeks following their marriage and watch evening fall. They would share good wine, good food and stimulating conversation before going upstairs and making love into the early hours of the morning.
He sparked up a cigarette, leaned against the window and stared out, smoke curling from the corners of his mouth. Nearly 16 years ago - how time passed. It was at times like this, as he looked at the thorny hedge that had once been a rosebush, or the wooden garden seat; the white paint flaking and peeling, almost totally engulfed in greenery, that he realised just how much could change.
Everything changed... except himself.
He would come home from work to a hot meal cooked by his young, beautiful wife. There would always be a full bottle of wine laid out in the conservatory for him. Yui told him to put his feet up and relax after a hard day at the office whilst she finished the preparation.
There was no way that Rei could have known this, he reasoned; yet still, something about the way she had spoken to him had caused the hairs on the back of his neck to stand on end.
"Did you microwave this, Rei...?" Gendo probed the brownish, friable mass that had once been rib-eye steak before him with the tip of his knife.
"Yes, sir." The reply from the kitchen.
He cut off a small piece and gingerly scooped it into his mouth. He closed his eyes, uttered a silent prayer and bit down.
"Is everything in order, sir?" Rei walked into the dining room carrying her own plate.
"Yes, of course... the steak is fine. I have never tried one cooked in a microwave before." He chewed thoughtfully. It looked disgusting and fell apart on his fork, but there was nothing wrong with the taste. He regarded Rei as she walked around the table with her own small plate of peas and carrots. The fact that Rei, being a vegetarian had even cooked meat for him in the first place was a surprise.
So preoccupied with the food had he been, that he had failed to notice that Rei now wore only her white school shirt. Each step she took gave him a prolonged flash of her long, shapely legs and her silky-smooth thighs as the fabric rode up to the sides. He nearly choked.
"R-rei! W-what happened to your skirt?" Rei placed the plate upon the table and slid back a chair. She leaned upon it briefly, giving Gendo a flash of her firm, bra-encased breasts through her open collar.
"I spilt something on it, sir." She brushed a hand through her hair and sat down to eat.
It had to be intentional. This was Rei's own, unsubtle way of getting what she wanted. He should have been angry. He should have sent her to her room immediately. He should have thrown plates at the wall...
He continued to eat in silence, but he paid no attention to the food. He realised that he was taking another step closer to the act that his body wanted so badly. He thanked heaven for his glasses reflecting the illumination from the crystal chandelier, hiding his staring eyes from her.
His eyes focussed on the soft skin of her neck. Rei seemed to be tilting her head slightly, exposing the area further to his gaze. It looked so warm, so kissable... so lickable...
He found himself staring at that thick, luscious hair. How badly he wanted to rub his face over it... Those exotic maroon eyes, big enough to go swimming in... Those smooth lips he had kissed once and wanted, no needed to kiss again... That clean, pale skin, all over her body for him to touch and explore...
His heart pounded in his chest and he felt an erection beginning to form in his trousers. He struggled to swallow the hard, partially uncooked carrots he chewed upon. Rei ate in silence, looking calmly downwards at her own meal.
"Rei..." his voice wavered.
"Yes, commander?" she looked up, her eyes meeting his through the lenses of his spectacles.
"I... ummm... that is to say... I... I... I... think..." he had felt this uncomfortable the first time he had gone on a date with Yui. They had gone dancing. Yui was wearing blue. Then they had gone to this ramen place and...
Why was he remembering this now?
"Sir?" Rei blinked her stunning crimson eyes once.
"I think that you look good... Really good." He looked at his knees, screwing his eyes tightly shut, furious at himself for his inept outburst.
"Thank you, commander."
When Gendo raised his head again, Rei had resumed eating. She now had her shirt unbuttoned halfway down, her plain cotton bra clearly visible. The upper slopes of her large, soft breasts bulged outwards from their confines, creating an impressive cleavage that seemed to draw him like a moth to the flame.
His hardness strained against his pants. Every time that Rei called him 'commander', he felt that she was somehow teasing him. She was smiling at him now. Placing his head in his hands he cried out silently to Yui for help, the final plea of a desperate man.
Yui had no answer. Yui would not save him from what he was about to do.
Yui looked back at him from across the table and beckoned him onwards.
Rei had stood up as he walked over to her. He could feel himself trembling as he approached. Being at least a foot taller than her he towered above her, yet it was clear to him that Rei held the power now. He could have walked away, locked the door to his study, laid on his bed and jerked off until he was firing blanks. He could have resisted and shown that he was above temptation, greater than the needs of the flesh, proved to her that he was as cold as everyone at NERV said he was. He could have resisted anything...
...except for that smile. For that smile was Yui's.
Gendo gently placed his hands upon her shoulders and felt the warmth of her body through her shirt. Her bright, sparkling eyes met his dark, sunken, tired ones. He gazed with burning desire at her as she looked upwards at him, her expression now as unreadable as ever. His ears buzzed with excitement and he was a little light-headed. He had felt like this once before - a long, long time ago.
All the fight was gone now. He had crossed the line. There was no-way back.
"May I kiss you, Rei?" his voice was little more than a hoarse whisper.
A brief pause that could have been a thousand years.